today is my birthday - the big 40!

Yep - I'm 40 today.
Feeling good after a morning of sleeping in.
Now I'm making tea that my friend amy sent me.
And plan on having a day of pampering.

It is strange to be 40 ( like "how did I get here!" kind of strange ) but also really great.
I feel more comfortable in my own skin and that counts for a lot.

My life is wonderful.

Figured I'd spend the morning writing a gratitude list to get this off on a positive start for this next year:
p.s. this is just off the top of my head - not in perfect order - but perfect anyhow!

1. I got to 40!
2. I get to listen to birds singing every morning on the front porch with my cat Pretty Girl.
3. I have a wonderful husband who I adore and we have so much fun together and support each others dreams.
4. My husband Jerry and I have photography in common.
5. Jerry and I love to travel together and bring our cameras with us.
6. Jerry and I enjoy living life at the same pace.
7. I am healthy and still full of life and energy. ( and so is my husband and my cat who is 15 years old now! )
8. I live in Southern California where I can wear my flip flops, jeans and tank tops almost the entire year.
9. We live on a very quiet street
10. we live near 2 trader joes, 1 whole foods and close to the freeways but far enough away. ( food is important! so is travel)
11. I have glorious, wonderful, caring, supportive friends all over the globe! How lucky am I to know them.
12. We have hard wood floors and I walk around barefoot all the time and feel the buttery flooring on my feet.
13. We have the best tree outside in our front yard.
14. We have a pomegranate tree and a eucalyptus tree out back in our big back yard.
15. my parents are fabulous people that live close enough that I get to see them pretty regularly.
16. my parents have a lot of energy and are young in spirit.
17. I don't have to wake up with an alarm clock. I wake up naturally when I feel ready.
18. I don't have to clock in or out at a job that isn't fulfilling.
19. I get to work as a photographer and artist
20. I live in the USofA.
21. I got to witness the first african-american to be nominated for president of the united states.
22. there isn't any drama in my life these days. I used it all up in my teens and twenties....and some of my thirties.
23. I've been sober for 21 years and don't struggle at all with being in the world. My insides have been transformed over time.
24. My life moves more slowly and I don't have the need to be somewhere else. I enjoy where I am.
25. I live in a world where we can re-invent ourselves as many times as we want to in order to figure out what fits and what doesn't.
26. we have a bath tub I get to take bubble baths in.
27. We have cable and tivo - i know that's so sad to you - but for me - it's a dream after some of the experiences I've had.
28. We don't use credit cards and have very little debt.
29. I got to work with Miguel Ruiz and it changed my life.
30. I get to practice what I learned from him whenever I remember to - and it helps me shift back into love and out of fear.
31. I have limited hearing in one ear - but the other one is better then most people can hear out of both!
32. My limited hearing helps me sleep at night and tune out the snoring that happens at the other side of the bed!
33. Jerry takes care of me when I am not feeling my best and he never complains about that.
34. Amy sent me birthday gifts that I get to open today!
35. Jerry is going to bring me my favorite dinner tonight.
36. My friend Erica is taking me to my favorite vietnamese restaurant for lunch today.
37. There are so many things to be grateful for that this list could go on forever!
38. I'm grateful that I have internet - ( high speed! ) and that I can e-mail friends who live far away and keep in touch with them because they mean so much to me!
39. I'm grateful I had great teachers who encouraged me to keep on going with my artwork.
40. If you made it to the bottom of this list then you get to read the biggest news of all! I'm grateful that I am pregnant with our first child!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am 3 and a half months along now and doing very well. Starting to show. our doctor told us that it is due March 2, 2009 which is EXACTLY 7 years from the day Jerry and I met! Goose Bumps! We will find out if it's a boy or a girl in about 7 weeks or so.

i wonder who made it to the bottom of this long list.??
do tell.

I hope you have a glorious day today and I'm off to finish my tea - and keep on having my fabulous birthday!

xoxoxo

mexican food and cupcakes

Had a birthday party on Saturday. my parents came up from san diego and there were about 35 friends there. It was a back yard party - low key - with mexican food for dinner - and cupcakes for dessert. ( best cupcakes I've ever had ) We pulled out 2 couches into the backyard with a bunch of chairs to give it a more relaxing feel. I think it worked out nicely. The strings of lights lighting up the space with warmth. We also hired a palm reader/ tarot card reader gal to do mini readings for everyone. That was pretty fun. I've never been to a party that had one there - but for my 40th birthday party - it felt like a real treat. It was nice to give all of my friends and family something different to experience as well.
My reading was quite amazing. I'd go into it - but it would probably bore you. It's just amazing to ME!
I had an astrological chart reading, a palm reading and a tarot reading! yes all three! I missed a bit of my own party during the reading- it took a while. But it was fun and different.

I had a polaroid guest book as well. So when people arrived they took a photo of themselves with the polaroid, taped it into the book and left me some words of wisdom. It was fun to go through the next day. Since polaroid is not making polaroid anymore it felt important to create something while I could. I few years from now I'm sure we won't be able to find any. It will be a relic from the past. Like 8 track tapes. Or the past 40 years of my life!!!!




Tomorrow is the actual birthday. I feel a gratitude list coming on.....

Tomorrow.

Quote of the day
" the human condition: lost in thought"
- Eckhart Tolle Stillness Speaks.

This is from a book two of my friends gave me for my birthday. It's a great little book. I was looking for a new source of spiritual goodness to read and it came to me in this book. My friends are so great!!!! thank you!

So glad I got to see everyone that night. I've been in the house a lot lately. Laying low, and working on that new project I eluded to a few entries ago. More to be revealed on that soon!

It was refreshing to hug so many people and spend time with folks I love.

dreaming

Last October we headed to Hawaii for our honeymoon. This October we are heading back!
Our one year anniversary will be spent at this exact beach - hopefully under cabanas like these! I just loved laying by the ocean and reading. Watching people play in the water, napping, listening to the waves. Glorious. We just finished making our arrangements, and I can't wait! We'd love to make it an annual trip, and living so close makes it easier. Plus we have family there. My Grandma is a native of Maui, now living in Oahu. She is regal, elegant, worldly, amazing.

This morning I'm listening to classical music, while my cat lays on the front porch and soaks in the sun with her own type of nirvana.

Thursday is my birthday - the big 40. I'm actually already feeling 40. It feels really good here. Glad I've made the journey to get this far in my life. But more on that later!.

Today is another day of rest, relaxation, and rejuvenation.

and dreaming of hawaii!!!

this just makes me laugh

Thinking of quiting your creative life for something else?
Do the above list of actions and see what comes up.

I know for me - I would have nothing circled!

August 18th! end of the tree project? or is it??

yes - here it is... a year has past and I've taken the final photo for the tree project I've been working on since August 18th, 2007.
It felt strange today to go outside and take this photo. I felt distracted. disconnected in a way from the tree. My life is so very different then it was a year ago. For so many reasons. But the short version is that my life is much more rich, much more full, and I feel more grounded in general then I did back then. Actually the tree this summer is less full then it was last year. It had a big trimming in the middle of the project and never fully got back to it's original depth. I too went through a trimming of sorts.... Of friends that no longer fit, of a business that no longer felt right, and whatever else fell out of the "tree" as a result of those things. I also got married in between and we are working on a new little project together that will be revealed shortly.
I was reflecting on that tree as a metaphor for self. Watching the tree evolve as I go through my own evolution. And it is very clear that I have and so has that tree.

The project was called "the 20th year"
But I think it too might evolve to be called "the family tree"

and I have a feeling that there might be an evolution to the series - a branching off - (pun intended)! - into a new direction - but with the same tree.

We shall see what happens next. I do know that a few photographer friends and I are talking about having a group show that centers around our images of trees. All of us do very different work and I think it would look spectacular in one room together. That might be down the road a bit but something to look forward to and plan out. Trees bring oxygen to the planet and we all know that our planet could use some. And trees also bring freshness to a human beings life. Who doesn't love the sounds of wind flowing through the trees, or the rusting of leaves in the fall, of the shade it provides during a picnic at a park....I personally love the morning ritual of coming out to the front porch with my cat and sitting near the tree with her. It just feels good there. brings me back to myself and into my day.

i'm so glad I did this project and I look forward to sharing the completed series in a show or a book or both some day soon.

Today I feel grateful for so many people, places and things. And that tree is definitely on that list.

*** quote for the day

If you look up, there are no limits.
-Japanese Proverb

artist's survival kit

I ran across Keri Smith's Artist's Survival Kit and had to share it with you.
Here is one that just cracked me up and also makes so much sense!
Why wait for others to award you when you obviously deserve an award.
Make one for yourself!

yes you! Go, Make one!

Why not?

World Wide Moment TODAY!!

WORLD WIDE MOMENT
WWM logo © world wide moment

"My name is Brett Brownell and I am a photographer and citizen of the United States. I would like to tell you about a project I'm heading which uses photography to unite people around the world for a moment of peace. It's called World Wide Moment. The concept is for people everywhere to take a photograph at the exact same moment. We're asking for your support and help in spreading the word about World Wide Moment.

The moment we have chosen for people to take photos around the world simultaneously is 08.08.08@08:08+08hrGMT. That time corresponds to August 8th, 2008 in the time zone where Beijing, China is located (coincidentally, this happens to be the first day of the Olympics). So in Phoenix the moment corresponds to August 7, 2008 at 5:08PM, and in New York it corresponds to August 7, 2008 at 8:08PM, and so on. It doesn't matter what kind of camera is used. It doesn't matter how professional or amateur. All that matters is for people to pause for a moment of peace, take a photograph, and share their unique story.

After the photographs are taken we will collect them, as well as the photographers' stories, on our website (www.worldwidemoment.org). Our goal is to display the photographs and stories for everyone to see in galleries and online in order to discuss and learn from this worldwide experience.

Please feel free to email me at worldwidemoment@gmail.com with any questions or ideas. I look forward to talking to you soon and we thank you for your support.

Sincerely,

Brett Brownell"

Westcoast takes place on Thursday, August 7th at 5:08pm.
Mark you calendars and read more about this here.

Julia Dean Opening

Here are a few photos I took with my iphone at the Julia Dean Opening Friday night.
The gallery was packed and there were people over flowing outside as well. It was a great turn out. The work was beautiful to see, and it was wonderful to spend time with good friends. My parents drove up from San Diego to come to the show which was so fun. We spent the day roaming around the Abbot Kinney area of Venice Beach. Super cute shops over there. Dinner at Hal's was Super too. Their Cesar was delightful!
Nancy, Aline, Liv, Eric, Marian, Maura, Ron, Jessica, Michael, it was great to see you there.

Life is really lovely these days. Working on knitting a blanket, reading, napping, spending time with friends and with my fabulous husband Jerry, sitting on the porch with my cat "pretty girl", going to BBQ's, Birthday parties, Baby Showers, and planning our one year anniversary trip to Maui, as well as my 40th birthday party which is right around the corner. Feeling like I am more comfortable in my own skin then ever before and that my life is sweeter then I imagined it could be. Creating my photographic work is an extension of all of that for me. i'm on my way to pick up a box of Polaroid this week so I can get started on another project.

Stay tuned..............